I Watched a Wrestling: Survivor Series 2016

I really felt like my last review here was almost too positive, so I decided I would review the WWE event that happened the night after one of the best show of the year: Survivor Series. Also I have to write a 12 page paper that's due Tuesday but I really don't want to think about it right now. So here we are.
This  might be one of the most frustrating events of the year, because on paper it's a solid card even though not all of the build was that great. The one match that needed a convincing build was Goldberg/Lesnar because their first and only match that happened 12 years ago was straight garbage. They did a surprisingly good job at building that match up, because I guess Goldberg is good at promos now. Who knew? Everything else was... ehhhh. The three Survivor Series matches boasted a huge amount of talent, but we weren't given anything to go on besides "The McMahons don't like each other and want their team to beat the other one." That's weak. Give them something to fight for aside from bragging rights.

Normally I'd cover the pre-show matches but neither was really special. We got yet another cruiserweight six-man tag team match, and Kane beating Luke Harper, because you gotta keep Kane looking strong.  Let's get onto the main card.

Team RAW Women (Bayley, Sasha Banks, Charlotte, Nia Jax & Alicia Fox w/ Dana Brooke) def. team Smackdown Women (Becky Lynch, Alexa Bliss, Naomi, Natalya & Carmella)


Before the match happens, it's revealed that Nikki Bella was *mysteriously* attacked before the match, and now Smackdown team "coach" Natalya has to fill in, much to her dismay I'm sure. 

All three Survivor Series matches had some glaring issues, but the women's match was deeply flawed. This is the deepest women's division the WWE main roster has had... ever, but the booking of the match was lazy and tired. Nobody really looked good in this match. The best performer on the roster, Sasha Banks, got taken out early. Nia Jax should be booked like a monster, but she looked like a chump going out to a Disarm-Her like it was nothing. Eventually it comes down to Charlotte and Bayley against Becky Lynch, and Bayley wins. Charlotte acts like she's happy for two second before turning on Bayley, which everybody in the building saw a mile away. The match overall was just sloppy and made it hard to care about anybody, which is a shame because everybody involved (aside from maybe Alicia and Dana) have been doing some fantastic work lately even if their stories haven't been the best. C.

I Watched a Wrestling: NXT Takeover Toronto

Hi, folks. My semester is finishing up in the next two weeks, so I'm gonna have a lot more time to write for fun, which is awesome. In the meantime, I really don't want to edit a short story for a class at the moment, so I figured I'd talk a little bit about some of the wonderful graps that happened in the past weekend.

Before the shows even happened, I knew NXT Takeover Toronto was going to be a much better show than Survivor Series. I mean, most times the NXT show is better than the main roster show anyway, but this was even a bigger gap. For some reason I've heard from a good amount of people that the weekly TV series has taken a drop in quality, and I'm not sure where that's coming from. There was a little bit of an awkward transition because people didn't know who would be moving up to the main roster when the brand extension happened, but for most of the year, NXT has been the best regular weekly TV show in wrestling, aside from maybe Lucha Underground.

The weekly show got really good when the Dusty Classic started up again, and it had a chance to use the context of the tournament to build up some undercard and midcard guys. On top of the men's division, there's Samoa Joe, Shinsuke Nakamura, and a huge drop, even considering guys like Austin Aries and Bobby Roode. So the Dusty Classic both were great in developing the tag division and giving singles wrestlers like Aries, Roode, Cedric Alexander, No Way Jose, Tye Dillinger, etc. stuff to do. Just think. NXT is telling great stories with Tye Dillinger while the main roster doesn't even know what to do with guys like Sami Zayn, Kevin Owens and Cesaro. Ugh.

Anyway, main roster ranting aside, let's get into the show.

Bobby Roode def. Tye Dillinger

Of everything on the card, this match had probably the best build, and that's because Bobby Roode's on a tear as his Donald Trump character. I wasn't sure how he was gonna fit in NXT and was worried he was just gonna be just another TNA guy, but his character is brilliant. And it is totally Donald Trump. Dude shows up and wants to make NXT great even though NXT already is great. He's a rich entitled jerkwad. He says and does things, and then when asked about it denies it all, even though there are record of him saying and doing the things. It's awesome. He begged Tye to team with him and then said Tye was desperate for him. Then he leaves Tye to get murdered alone at the hands of Sanity and blames the loss on him even though he bailed. It's great, great heel work.

The entrance alone with the choir deserves all the praise. And so does Tye Dillinger's weird Doctor Strange get-up. And the match is dope too. It's not gonna be the best match in the world, but it's solid as hell. Tye works so much better as an underdog babyface character than he ever did as a heel enhancement dude. He's still basically the Tyler Breeze Honorary Jobber to the Stars, but at least he gets some more shine in this role than what he was doing before the Cien Almas match. This was just a well-worked, character-driven match that further established Bobby as more than "TNA Guy No. 286." Tye is a better wrestler than he gets credit for, and this was one of his best-worked matches. Loved how he was hot right out the gate. Good work on the head/neck by Bobby as well to eventually set up the DDT, and some cool nearfalls that played to the super hot crowd. I really do hope at some point he can get at least somewhat of a push and maybe even win on a Takeover Special. B+

Wretro Wrestling: Royal Rumble 2007

Via WWE

Hi y'all. Welcome to my latest (hopefully) weekly column in which I dissect a classic pay-per-view available on the WWE Network, chosen by pure chance. I'm a Network subscriber, but I haven't watched as many old PPV's as I would like. Which is strange, because my original reason for subscription was so I could watch the PPVs I missed as a kid (my brother and I loved wrestling but never enough that would warrant our parents paying hefty costs), but I got too caught up in the current product to really dive in.


So this is my reason to go watch more classic (and not-so-classic) PPVs. All shows that happened before June 2015 (when I started watching again) are eligible. That includes WWE, WCW, ECW and NXT Takeovers. The first show that ended up being selected as the 2007 Royal Rumble, and I don't think I could've landed on a better time period. This is right about the time where I stopped caring altogether about wrestling because it was Stupid and For Babies, so I'm familiar with just about all the wrestlers here, but the specific time period escapes me. Let's dive into this.

The Hardy Boyz def. MNM

This is about as solid as an opener you can get without the opener being a potential show-stealer. The Hardy Boyz aren't at their best at this point in time, but they're still solid as hell because they're the damn Hardy Boyz, and the Hardy Boyz are a top 5 tag team of all time. MNM were a pretty underrated tag team as well. I'm disappointed John Morrison (or at the time, Johnny Nitro) never really had it together in the WWE because he had so much potential. That might be the WWE's fault considering how money he is on Lucha Underground, but still. The man deserved a better run than he ever got.

The match overall is a fun back and forth, with the Hardyz eventually picking up a win with Matt Twist-of-Fate-ing Johnny and Jeff going for the Swanton Bomb. Fun stuff, though I could've done without Melina's involvement. Wish Johnny had Taya throughout his career instead of her. B.

I Watched a Wrestling: EVOLVE 68/69 Reviews

Hey folks, I could keep up the illusion that I am capable of keeping up with WWE programming at a pace good enough to write about it regularly, but that's just not true. There have been weeks I've had to skip RAW/Smackdown completely, much less have time to write about it.

Something I can control better is reviewing big shows I watch and want to write about as I go for them. This is much better-suited for when I actually have free time. So I'm not going to do a regular column following a specific program, but instead review whatever I want when I want, because this is mostly for my own enjoyment anyway.

This past weekend I finally got to watching EVOLVE 68 and 69 shows. I know that this weekend was also the weekend of EVOLVE 70 and 71 shows, so this is clearly out of date right away, but I'm a little behind on my wrestling watching.

EVOLVE has had an up-and-down year. On one hand, most of the in-ring content has been great. They've worked out something great with WWE that benefits both companies, allowing performers to work WWN shows and WWE shows at the same time. Some of the best matches you'll find all year are on EVOLVE cards.

On the other hand, the booking has been bad. Aside from the Gargano/Galloway feud that evolved into something more along the lines of NXT vs. TNA, there hasn't been much to be inspired about. The company seems to only actually focus on one feud on the time, so it's mostly wrestling for wrestling's sake. That's not necessarily bad, but it's killed plenty a match in the EVOLVE Championship and Tag Team Championship divisions. Championship matches suffer when there's no real heat between the competitors.

EVOLVE 68 and 69 have some of those problems, but the lack of championship matches allows them to avoid some of the biggest issues the company has had. Let's dive in, shall we?

EVOLVE 68

Fred Yehi def. Jigsaw

The opening match of the weekend was extremely my jam. Jigsaw is an underrated performer who deserves more love than he gets, and I'm excited for him to be back with EVOLVE. Meanwhile, Yehi is one of the hottest things in the indies right now, in my opinion. He's got all the tools to be great and has some fantastic matches even though he hasn't received too much of a significant push in the bigger-name indies. With guys like Gargano and TJP moving on up, Yehi's gonna be one of the people that benefits the most. This is a really good match, and pretty much the perfect way to open up a show. Yehi needed a singles win after losing some big matches, and Jigsaw was a good person to get him over. Very solid chain wrestling here, and one of the best matches of the night. A-

RAW Report for 8/15/16: What's a Demon King to a Crossfit God?

Via WWE.com

A very long time ago I attempted to do weekly reviews on WWE Monday Night Raw. It lasted a grand total of one week because I am bad at doing things I would like to do. But as time goes by I realize more and more that I need to do things to keep my writing sharp (or as sharp as my rambling nonsense can ever be), even if it's saying words about a fake sport to an audience of two people.

So Monday Night Raw happened last night, and it's the go-home show to Summerslam. There's a ton of stuff happening on that reportedly seventeen-hour show, so they needed to get everybody excited for what's to come. Let's dive in, shall we?

Rusev vs. Cesar-OH GOD NO

I'm going to skip through writing up about the opening segment, because it goes along with the main event. So let's head right into the first match of the night, Sheamus vs. Sami Zayn with Cesaro on commentary. Sheamus and Cesaro have been fighting to prove who is better and tougher for the past two weeks, and we're mercifully saved from that with a nice little Sami Zayn/Sheamus contest. Sheamus has the terrible affliction of having one of the most boring characters on the show, so people have a tendency to think his matches are boring as well. That's not true. Maybe it's because he's wrestling Cesaro and Sami Zayn who could put on a good match with a cactus, but these matches he's been having the past few weeks have been dope. He's not going through the motions.

Cesaro distracts Sheamus so Sami can hit him with a Helluva Kick, and it works because Cesaro's getting payback for costing him the US Championship. He's not just distracting the heel to be a dick, which is what oftentimes happens in these sorts of situations.

This sets up a backstage brawl between the Swiss Superman and the Pale One, and Mick Foley breaks it up by announcing a Best-of-7 series to decide who is better, starting with Summerslam. It's nice that these two are given reason to have a million matches with each other, but I'm not huge into watching SEVEN more matches between these two when Cesaro already has two wins in the past two weeks. Match: B+; Foley's GM Work: C.